The Informer’s Monologue from Tejas Verdes by Fermín Cabal

"Yes, it was me who grassed her up. If it hadn’t been for me, she might still be alive today."

Overview of Tejas Verdes

Tejas Verdes is a searing and poignant play that delves into the aftermath of political violence and the cost of betrayal during the Pinochet regime in Chile. The Informer’s monologue captures a moment of self-reckoning, where guilt, justification, and the desperate need for understanding collide. This piece demands emotional depth, vulnerability, and a nuanced exploration of moral ambiguity.

Character Breakdown: The Informer

  • Name: The Informer

  • Age: Early 30s to mid-40s

  • Background: A former member of a political organization who, under torture, betrayed her comrade, Colorina, leading to Colorina’s death. The Informer is burdened by guilt but also seeks to rationalize her actions.

  • Who the Character is Talking To in This Moment: The audience, as a form of confession and self-explanation.

  • What’s Just Happened: The Informer is recounting her betrayal, its circumstances, and her belief in Colorina’s forgiveness, attempting to reconcile with her own guilt.

The Monologue

Yes, it was me who grassed her up. If it hadn’t been for me, she might still be alive today. It was her boyfriend they were after, Miguel Menéndez, a leading light in the university and my friend in the organisation. A real heavyweight. In a way, it was me who brought them together. I’d met Colorina in Chillán in the summer of 1970. We went there to do voluntary work to help with development in the area. I didn’t care for her that much to begin with. I saw right away that she was from a rich family. Not that rich, perhaps, but she didn’t go short of anything and when she went into houses and saw the poverty there, she opened her eyes very wide and just stood there in silence, staring. Then I got to like her. She was a girl who made you like her, so fine, so noble, so ... delicate. I never thought they’d go as far as killing her, I thought they’d get out of her pretty fast where Miguel was and then they’d let her go, but sometimes things go wrong, the unexpected happens ... Some moron was playing with a gun and it went off. The wound developed complications, they had to put her in hospital ... If you want to judge me, please do. That’s not why I’m here. I have nothing to be ashamed of. They tortured me and I gave in. It’s that simple. And till the day I die, I’ll carry the wound they gave me. You see, you betray everyone around you, your own people. Anyone you’ve loved, men you’ve been in love with, your friends, your family if you have to. And they know who to ask you about, because when you do give in, the more pain they cause you, the more you submit. I know that Colorina has forgiven me. I know because at that time we were sharing the same prison and one day I told her. Hate me, Colorina, it was me. I took them to your house. And she hugged me and kissed me. And in spite of the blindfolds we always wore, I know she meant it. The hands never lie. But I never thought they’d go as far as killing her.

BROKEN DOWN:

"Yes, it was me who grassed her up. If it hadn’t been for me, she might still be alive today."

  • Commentary: The monologue begins with a stark admission, immediately drawing the audience into the Informer’s guilt and self-awareness. Actors should deliver this line with a mix of resignation and sorrow.

"It was her boyfriend they were after, Miguel Menéndez, a leading light in the university and my friend in the organisation. A real heavyweight."

  • Commentary: This section introduces the context of the betrayal, highlighting the Informer’s proximity to both the victim and the political cause. Actors should balance detachment with subtle regret.

"Then I got to like her. She was a girl who made you like her, so fine, so noble, so ... delicate."

  • Commentary: The Informer’s reflection on Colorina humanizes the victim, deepening the emotional weight of the betrayal. Actors should convey the complexity of admiration and loss.

"If you want to judge me, please do. That’s not why I’m here. I have nothing to be ashamed of. They tortured me and I gave in. It’s that simple."

  • Commentary: This moment is a powerful mix of defiance and vulnerability. Actors should lean into the tension between the Informer’s justification and underlying guilt.

"I know that Colorina has forgiven me. I know because at that time we were sharing the same prison and one day I told her. Hate me, Colorina, it was me. I took them to your house. And she hugged me and kissed me."

  • Commentary: The Informer’s belief in Colorina’s forgiveness is poignant and deeply human. Actors should deliver this with quiet intensity, balancing the relief of absolution with lingering self-doubt.

"But I never thought they’d go as far as killing her."

  • Commentary: The final line encapsulates the Informer’s regret and the unexpected consequences of her actions. Deliver this with a mix of sorrow and disbelief, letting the audience feel the weight of the tragedy.

Suggested New Thoughts Chunking / Paragraphing

  • Opening Confession: The Informer admits her betrayal and its consequences, setting the tone of guilt and reflection.

  • Context of the Betrayal: She recounts her relationship with Colorina and the circumstances leading to her decision.

  • Rationalization: The Informer defends her actions, explaining the torture she endured and the inevitability of her breaking point.

  • Seeking Forgiveness: She recalls Colorina’s forgiveness, emphasizing her emotional conflict and need for absolution.

  • Closing Regret: The monologue concludes with the Informer’s disbelief and sorrow over Colorina’s death.

Journey Keypoints

  • Hook: The Informer’s stark confession immediately captures attention and sets up the moral dilemma.

  • Turning Point: Her justification for the betrayal and the recounting of her torture reveal her inner turmoil.

  • Climax: The memory of Colorina’s forgiveness provides an emotional peak, offering a glimmer of redemption.

  • Resolution: The closing regret underscores the irreversible nature of the betrayal and its tragic outcome.

Performance Tips

  • Embody the Contradictions: The Informer is torn between guilt, defiance, and a need for forgiveness. Embrace these contradictions to create a complex and compelling performance.

  • Use Stillness: The monologue’s intensity benefits from moments of stillness and reflection, allowing the weight of the words to land.

  • Highlight the Emotional Shifts: Transition smoothly between confession, justification, and regret to maintain the emotional arc.

  • Connect with the Audience: The Informer is speaking directly to the audience, creating an intimate and confrontational tone. Use eye contact and pauses to heighten the impact.

Learn with Acting Coach Scotland

The Informer’s monologue from Tejas Verdes is a deeply challenging piece that explores moral ambiguity, guilt, and forgiveness. At Acting Coach Scotland, we help actors navigate the complexities of such monologues, delivering performances that resonate with authenticity and emotional depth.

Explore our coaching programs here.